Book Review - I Will Never Forget by Elaine C. Pereira

I Will Never Forget: A Daughter's Story of her Mother's Arduous and Humorous Journey Through Dementia.

Elaine C. Pereira
File Size: 435 KB
Print Length: 257 pages
Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
Publisher: iUniverse (January 20, 2014)
Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc.
Language: English
ASIN: B008132KMO

In the words of the author, "My mother's is a story that needed to be told. She was a kind, brilliant and talented woman all of my life until dementia took hold distorting her persona and leaving an agitated, bewildered and compromised person in its wake."

This is the story that Pereira does tell, and it is wonderful that she had such a close relationship with her mother and was able to help her in her declining years. Other women who are in similar circumstances - caring for a parent with dementia - will be able to relate and learn from example how best to deal with the challenges. There are many.

One of the messages that comes across strong in the book is the importance of treating the person with dementia with respect. It takes a great deal of patience to maintain that respect when dealing with the frustrations and fears that come with caring for someone who is slowly losing mental faculties. Pereira managed to hang on to patience and love, and she shared a lovely poem at the end that is comforting to those who think they have lost their parent even before he or she is gone. My father had severe dementia before he died, and it would have been nice to know he still loved me at the end.

I struggled a bit with the writing, however. The story was not told in a linear timeline, so it was a bit confusing to jump around in time. I also thought the story strayed away from Mom for too long in places. The incidents - like her son's fight with cancer - were important, but the telling of that could have been condensed and more focused on how that impacted Mom.

The best parts were the scenes with Mom, when the reader got to experience her humor and her steadfastness. That is where the emotional connection between author and reader was made, and I got a real sense of the "heart" of this story.

Elaine will be my guest this coming Wednesday with a fun "mock" interview with her mother. I do hope you can stop by and get to know a bit more about Elaine and her mother, Betty Ward.

You can get I Will Never Forget at the following retail sites:

 AMAZON  * BARNES AND NOBLE  *  IUNIVERSE          

Monday Morning Levity

It's been a while since I shared something from my friend, Tracy Farr, and this one had me laughing out loud. Maybe it was just me, but chances are you will find it funny, too.

The pert-near truth about daughters


I have a daughter. Chances are, you have a daughter, too. There’s a special room in heaven just waiting for us. It has a sign on the door that reads: “Shell Shock Recovery Room. No Sudden Loud Noises!”

I’m not an authority on daughters. I only have the one whereas you may have a whole herd of them. But I’m starting to understand some things that I’d like to pass on to those of you who have no daughters, but who really want a few because you’ve heard they’re always polite and never belch at the table (which is a total lie).

So, here’s what I’ve learned so far. It’s not much, but it’s all I’ve got:

1. All little girls want horses. They will not be denied. Sure, you could use the logical arguments of high cost, not having enough back yard to keep one, a horse’s pooper-scooper being called a shovel – but when it comes to horses, little girls don’t think logically. It’s best to buy them a subscription to a horse magazine and put off buying a real horse until they’re married and their husband can afford it.

If the subscription doesn’t work, maybe a stuffed animal or poster will do. If not, don’t blame me.

2. A daughter is born with a telephone attached to her left ear. You probably missed it on the day of her birth. Don’t feel bad, most parents do. But now that you see it, I would suggest subscribing to the “You’ve Got A Daughter” cell phone plan. Unlimited minutes, unlimited texting, no roaming charges, national and international coverage, nights & weekends, rollover minutes, and friendly customer service guaranteed for the life of your daughter. It will cost you $1.5 gazillion a year, but that’s a whole lot cheaper than if she “borrowed” your phone and sent her 30 best friends 1,000 text messages a day.

I guess you could get her a phone “only to be used in emergencies,” but a daughter’s definition of “emergency” is: “I haven’t talked to my BFFs for nearly 17 minutes. I must talk to them NOW or the world will come to an end.”

3. When your baby girl starts talking about needing to shave parts of her body, that’s when you need to start looking for a boat. It would be easier if you already had one, but sometimes it’s impossible to see the future through your daughter’s bright, girlish smiles and hugs that seem to say, “Daddy, I love you.”

WARNING: When your daughter gives you those bright, girlish smiles and hugs that seem to say, “Daddy, I love you,” she’s really setting you up for a trap. It’s just a ploy to get either a horse or to borrow one of your razors. Don’t fall for it. Be a man and buy the biggest boat you can afford. You’re going to be using it a lot, so you might as well be comfortable.

4. The menstrual cycle is a perfect excuse to go fishing on that brand new boat. If you have more than one “little girl” in the house, you get to fish twice as much. If you’re a man who has a hard time talking about “that time of the month,” join the rest of us out on the lake. We’ll be waiting for you by the dam.

5. One day your little girl is wearing pigtails, the next day she has boobs. Boobs attract boys; their brains short-circuit when confronted with cleavage; but boys understand shotguns and the damage they can inflict if they don’t steer clear of your little girl’s “blessings.” A daddy has to do what a daddy has to do – whether it be with .12 gauge or .24. And if the shotgun doesn’t do the trick, try the chainsaw.

6. Don't be sad when the day comes that you must “give your daughter away.” Just be thankful you don't have to pay someone to take her. Although, there are times when I think the dowry system of marriage should be revised. (Those times correspond to whenever the goats are out of their pen.)

Hear Ye! Hear Ye! all future suitable suitors for my daughter’s hand in matrimony. You are hereby informed that on the happy day of your union, not only will you receive my daughter and all the bills she’s run up over the years, but you’ll also receive three pygmy goats and their offspring, along with enough fencing material to keep them on your property and not on mine. I’ll even help load your truck at no extra charge.

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Tracy Farr is a musician and humorist, and in his spare time he drives a school bus. You can find more fun stuff at Stinky Creek , Texas

Guest Blog

Here is your weekly dose of humor from my friend Tracy Farr. Enjoy.....


The Beckster

I betcha you’ll never guess where I am right now as I’m writing this. Go ahead, give it a shot. You’ll never guess. Not in a million years. Giving up so soon? Gosh, you didn’t even try. Okay I’ll tell you. I’m in downtown Ft. Worth, sitting in the Ft. Worth Convention Center watching the 2009 Marching Auxiliaries National Dance Championships.

That’s right – DANCE! And I’ve been here since 6 a.m. By the time I get home to edit all this, I will have spent 14 hours in a perfectly-good arena and not seen one hockey game.

Fourteen hours of nonstop estrogen-induced bust-a-move dance performed by little girls wearing a whole lot of practically nothing. No Red-Blooded American “Old Guy” should EVER be caught in a place like this when he could be out on the lake or watching NASCAR! But my little girl, Becky, is on one of the dance teams and that’s what makes it okay – so they say.

Becky is 11 and in 5th grade. Her full name is Rebecca Michelle, but we call her Becky. Sometimes we call her The Beckster, other times Beck, Becca, BeckBeck, Booster, Bebop, and for some odd reason, Parker. (Don’t ask me why because I don’t know.)

Beckster has been dancing for eight years, but she’s not your typical “dancer girl.” She likes to ride on my motorcycle. She’s the only one in my family who has had the nerve to go flying with me. She doesn’t mind watching me skin a squirrel. And she can belch better than you and me put together. Yep, she’s gonna make a good catch for some guy out there. But not just ANY guy. In fact, let’s just forget about guys for now. I’m sorry I even brought up the subject.

ATTENTION ALL GUYS: Yes, my Beckster can bust a move on the dance floor, throwing her hips around in such a way you’d bet money they were about to fly off, hit someone in the head, and give them a concussion – but, that does NOT mean she’s interested in YOU!

In fact, if you even THINK about coming over to my house to pick up my little girl, you better know something in advance – I have weapons. They’re loaded, and I know how to point and click! So, it might be best for you to go and pick on some other daddy’s little girl. I cannot be held responsible for what might happen if you don’t.

Just remember – goats eat everything.
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The Daily Spittoon - – Not as good as a nap, but close.