Monday Morning Musings

Good Monday morning. I trust everyone had a great weekend and are energized for the work week ahead.

What I'm Reading: Her Sister by Karen Rose Smith. This is book seven of her Search For Love series, but the first one I have tried. It is a romance with some mystery and suspense, and so far it is a good read.

What I'm Dismayed About: I read an article in The Dallas Morning News yesterday written by a woman who had a harrowing experience with Child Protective Services. Kari Anne Roy, an Austin writer who writes children's books as KA Holt, had just returned from vacation and was inside her house sorting through mail when a neighbor knocked on her door. When Kari opened the door, she saw that the neighbor had Kari's six-year-old son in hand. The neighbor was overly concerned about the boy being alone in the neighborhood park, which was in full view of Kari's house and only 150 yards away.

The neighbor was convinced that this was a case of child neglect, so she called the police. What the neighbor didn't know, and didn't want to hear from Kari, is that the boy had been supervised by an older sister, who had just run home for a minute and that Kari's children often played outside at the park without an adult on hand.

Courtesy of Galleryhip.com

While relating the sequence of events that led to the visit by Child Protective Services and the humiliating interviews she and her children were subjected to, Kari kept repeating "They (the kids) were just playing outside." She was dismayed that children can't "just play outside" like many of us did as kids, and I share that dismay. Her kids are now afraid to play outside. Not just because of stranger-danger, but for fear that the police will be called again.

You can read more about the impact this has had on the family on Kari's blog, Haiku of the Day. The post was originally made on September 9th, and the comments opened an interesting discussion of child safety. Well worth a read.

What I'm Happy About: That I could feel fall in the air when I took my walk this morning. There is a certain crispness that heralds the coming of the colors on the trees, and I especially love this time of the year. That's one reason that I loved Slim Randles post here last week, An Ode to Autumn.

Now For Some Fun: My sister sent me these jokes, and the second one made me laugh out loud.

I was with my wife at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunk swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.

I asked her, "Do you know him?"

"Yes." She sighed. "He's my old boyfriend.  He began drinking right after we split up years ago, and hasn't been sober since."

"My God!"  I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"

And then the fight started...
________________________________

When our lawn mower broke my wife kept nagging me to get it fixed.  But, I always had something else to take care of. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.

I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again, I handed her a toothbrush and said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway."

The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

Be honest, you laughed at that last joke, right? 

Monday Morning Musings

I made the mistake of watching national news the other day and was reminded why I am much better off not paying attention to all that.

Did you hear about Cynthia Robinson, the Florida woman who sued R.J. Reynolds because her husband died from smoking-related illness? The jury gave her $23.6 billion in punitive damages. That's billions, folks, and an additional $16.8 million in compensatory damages. Robinson  had been part of a previous class-action suit against R.J. Reynolds that was settled in 2006, but that $145 billion verdict had been overturned on appeal. In a television interview, Robinson said, "We have finally gotten justice."

Justice? I'll let you decide for yourselves, but I think it is beyond absurd. More at the Huffington Post

On a much nicer note, my two weeks of drama camp ended with our performances over the weekend. We had sell-out audiences for both shows, and what great energy that creates for the players. They did an amazing job, and I am always so thrilled to work with the kids and the camp leaders.

Here are just a few more pictures from the show and the camp.

This wonderful poster was designed by one of our board members, Jim Willis.

 

These lovely pictures of the lions were taken by Bob Williams Photography and used with permission.

The drama camp, along with all the other activities that go on at the Winnsboro Center For the Arts, is put on by volunteers. We do pay professional music and theatre people, but the rest is done by the wonderful people in this place I call home. I am so thankful for all the people who stepped up to make this a huge success.

Friday's Odds and Ends

One thing I've learned this week, don't get sick half way through the summer drama camp. One of the other camp leaders said wouldn't it be wonderful if we could schedule being sick. "Let's see, I'm not doing anything from August first through the seventh. How about the flu then?"

Actually, I didn't have the flu, but I had a serious infection which took forever to respond to meds. Hopefully, I will be ready for the weekend when we open "Phineas Peabody's Magical Musical Circus," which the kids wrote and produced with the assistance of a few of us adults and teen helpers.

Anyway, the awesome camp leaders took over and this may be the best show we've had from the summer drama camp. I wonder if there is a message there? LOL

Here is a picture of one of the girls who has been at the camp for three years now. She is a terrific piano player, as well as being great on stage, and she is so much fun to work with.

Next up are some pictures of the chalk art the kids did on the sidewalk leading to the door of the art center, inviting everyone to "Come to the Circus." They did some great posters, too, as well as designs for the camp shirt and playbill cover. Drama camp stirs all kinds of creativity.

This last picture is from a planning session as one of the camp leaders and some teen helpers worked with the kids to brainstorm some of the story. The teen helpers have been through drama camp several times, and they have all continued to be active in the troupe of young players. I love working with the kids. And the lady on the left, Hayley, was one of the very first kids that I had in a show the second or third year I started volunteering at the Winnsboro Center for the Arts. What a thrill to have her back as an adult, teaching the kids and directing the show along with Jennifer Zimmerman and George Gagliardi.

L-R: Hayley Morris, Kaitlyn Sullivan, Hunter Williams, Kennedie Williams, Thomas Hulme

While I go off to finish the last details for the show, I'll leave you with some fun from Pickles

Opal is in the kitchen opening drawers and calls out, "Earl! Have you seen Roscoe's toothpaste?"

Earl is in the living room and calls back, "Roscoe's toothpaste?"

Opal comes into the living room, holding a little doggie toothbrush. "Yes. You know. The special beef-flavored toothpaste I bought for him."

Earl answers, "Nope."

Opal looks at the plate on Earl's lap. "Wait just a minute...! What're you eating on those crackers?!"

He doesn't answer, and she walks off shaking her head. "Oh, for pete's sake. I can't believe you."

Earl says, "What? I was hungry."

Friday's Odds and Ends

Nothing to rant about today. OMG, somebody take my temperature. (smile) Seriously, I think I have been so busy with productions at the local art center, I have not paid attention to the national news. I hardly pay attention to the local news, either. I never have the television on during the day, and only watch the late evening news to see if the weather forecast matches what I can see outside my windows. The old joke about the weather - if you want to know what the weather is like step outside - does hold true.

I've had a lot of fun working with the Young Players at the Winnsboro Center For the Arts on our Nite of Comedy. The kids - most of whom have come through the Summer Drama Camp - put on skits and funny music and then we do improv.  The performance will be June 28, and shortly after that the drama camp starts. I always forget from year to year how much work is involved in organizing and preparing for these events. But I do so enjoy working with the kids.

Today in my inbox I found a neat message from my sister with pictures of kids and dogs. They were all so cute, I was tempted to share them all here, but settled for just a couple. I think you'll agree that they have a great "aw" factor.

Do you have a favorite memory of a special dog that might tug a heart string or two? If so, please share in the comments. One of my favorites is of our dog, Ruffy. He was a mix between a wolf and a German shepard, but he was very loveable and hugable. Ruffy was always good for a romp or a walk, and it was undeniable that he wormed his way into all our hearts. Never was that more evident than the day the kids did a survey at the dinner table and decided they all liked the dog better than me.

Since I have a jillion things to do today, I'm going to keep this short and end with a joke. I found this one on The Laugh Factory.

Ralph is driving home one evening, when he suddenly realizes that it's his daughter's birthday and he hasn't bought her a present. He drives to the mall, runs to the toy store, and says to the shop assistant, "How much is that Barbie in the window?" In a condescending manner, she says, "Which Barbie?" She continues, "We have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.00." Ralph asks, "Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.00 when all the others are only $19.95?" "That's obvious," the saleslady says. "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, Ken's boat, Ken's furniture..." 

How Much is Your Lemonade?

Before I turn the page over to my guest today, I do need to announce the winners of last week's contest. I held it over until today as there were so few comments on the blog last week it hardly made a contest. The winners of an ARC for Stalking Season, the second book in the Seasons Series, or an e-book of their choice are: Patricia Stolty, Yolanda Renee, and LD Masterson. Congrats to all.  

Today I am posting at The Blood Red Pencil blog where there is a good discussion going on about the awkward word usage that can pull you out of a story. I am also a guest at Heidi Thomas's blog   sharing some of the fun I had researching Boxes For Beds. 

And now here's humorist Slim Randles and his friend Herb with a business lesson for entrepreneurs of all ages.

We heard about the lemonade stand later, of course, as it was several blocks from where the rest of us lived, but it was only a couple of houses from Herb Collins. He had to go there. He couldn't resist.

The stand was set up by Heather and Tim Naismith, a brother/sister team whose ages added together wouldn't hit 18. Herb watched them set it up on that hot afternoon and finally couldn't stand it. He had to have some fun.

The lemonade was fifty cents, a bargain in anyone's book, as canned soda pop is running about a buck these days. And anyone can see that a lemonade stand set up by two youngsters is something to be encouraged. The free enterprise system at its very best. Ingenuity. American spirit. Besides, those Naismith kids are kinda cute, having worked so hard to get the lemonade made and the card table set up out under the tree in front.

Herb explained later that what he was really setting out to do, besides giving the kids some business, was to teach them a few harmless lessons in how to succeed in retail. Years ago, before he got into the trucking business, Herb ran a pawn shop in the city. He was known to be a sharp trader, and he delighted in telling us how little he paid for things and how much he sold them for.

"Hi kids," he told them. "Pretty good lemonade?"

"The best, Mr. Collins," Heather said.

"So ... fifty cents a glass? Well, all right, I'll have a glass."

He put down fifty cents and they filled a tall paper cup nearly to the brim for him. It was good lemonade.

"So how much for four glasses of lemonade?"

Tim did some silent figuring. "Two dollars, sir."

 "Well, that's the retail price, of course," Herb said, "but now we're buying in bulk. What you do when someone wants to buy in bulk is you adjust the price. I think I should be able to buy four glasses of lemonade at, say, forty cents a glass. What do you think?"

The kids whispered in each other's ears.

"Mr. Collins," said Heather, "if you buy four glasses for forty cents each, how much would you expect to pay for a dozen glasses?"

Heartened by their interest in business, Herb said, "Oh, probably about thirty cents a glass, I guess. You have to make allowances for volume, you see."

"Good," said Heather. "We'll sell you a dozen glasses of lemonade, then, because we want to sell a lot of it, and we'll only charge you $3.60 for them."

Herb pulled out the money.

"But you'll have to drink them all here," Heather said. "We don't have a license for carry-out."
 
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Brought to you by the dogs and cats at your local shelter. Visit them and bring home a new best friend. You’ll never be sorry.

If you enjoy these posts from Slim, you would enjoy his book, Home Country, a compilation of the many columns he has done over the years. Some of them are humorous and a some of them are a bit more serious, but all are delightful. 

Blogger Book Fair and Drama Camp

This is not going to be my usual Friday blog. For a lot of reasons. Number one is the Youth Drama Camp that has consumed my time all week, but it has been so much fun. Here is a picture of some of the kids practicing one of the songs for the musical written by the talented George Gagliardi, a Dallas singer/songwriter. It has been so exciting to see the creativity just flourish in these campers. They have helped write the music, the script, design the set, find costumes, and so much more.

The other reason, is we are having more company. We love having our kids come out to Grandma's Ranch, and it is always a good excuse for me to unconnect a bit, which I will do this weekend.

I also wanted to announce a fun event coming up in cyberspace on July 22 - the Blogger Book Fair. Apparently this event has taken place before, but this is the first year I heard about it, so I decided to sign up. Of course, I forgot that July was probably the worst month to try to add a lot of extra things to do as it is already a crazy-busy month. But I did sign up, so I will be having guests on my blog the week of July 22 thru the 26, and I will be somewhere in cyberspace on their blogs that week.

There are a lot of authors participating in this event and it is going to be great fun. Lots of great give-aways, too.

I wanted to put this badge on the sidebar of this blog, but Blogger changed some things again, and I can't seem to get the layout function to work so I can work on the sidebar. If anyone has any tips on what I need to do, I welcome them.

Monday Jokes

 More fun from Jokes for Kids   Did I mention that a lot of these are submitted by kids. They are so clever.

What kind of pet just lays around the house?
A car-pet!

Where would you find a cat with no legs?Exactly where you left it!

Why do hens lay eggs?
Because if they dropped them, they would break!

Why are penguins so popular on the Internet?Because they have Web feet!

Why did the turtle cross the road?To get to the Shell station!

 

What do you call a turtle that flies?A shell-icopter!

What do you get when you cross a dinosaur with a pig?Jurassic pork!

Why can't penguins fly?They can't afford plane tickets!

Friday's Jokes

More fun from Jokes for Kids       Enjoy....



Why wasn’t Cinderella any good at soccer?
She kept running away from the ball!

Why couldn't they play cards on the ark?
Noah was sitting on the deck!

What's green and purple and goes up and down?
Barney in an elevator!

How many ears does Davy Crockett have?
Three: a left ear, a right ear, and a wild frontier!

Why did Captain Kirk go into the Ladies?
He wanted to go where no man had gone before!

What do you call James Bond in the bath?
Bubble 07!

Why didn't Superman know he could fly?
Because he didn't know his Cape Abilities!

What do you get if Batman and Robin get smashed by a steam roller?
Flatman and Ribbon!

Jokes For Monday

For the next two weeks while I am busy with the Youth Drama Camp, I decided to share some jokes on Mondays and Fridays, with Wednesday being my guest day.

Because I will be focused on kids - lots of kids - I thought it would be fun to share some jokes by and for kids. I found this neat website Jokes For Kids   and right away I knew I was going to like it. Here is a quote prominently featured on the home page:

"The best way to make children good is to make them happy."
 Oscar Wilde

Here now are a few short  jokes. Share them with anyone who might enjoy a chuckle or two.  

What did Mickey say when Minnie asked if he was listening?
I'm all ears!

How can you make seven even?
Remove the "S".

Did you hear about the two silkworms who had a race?
It ended in a tie!

What does a tree do when he is ready to go home?
He leaves!

What did one ear say to the other ear?
Between us we have brains!

Monday Morning Musings

The summer drama camp for young players starts today at the Winnsboro Center for the Arts, so I will be incredibly busy for the next two weeks with the camp and for the show we will do at the end of the camp.But I'm not complaining, mind you. It's just an excuse to play for two weeks, and we will have a lot of fun.

I started doing this camp for kids about six or seven years ago, and we have had one every year since. It is always so much fun to work with young people and encourage them to explore their creativity. The purpose of the camp is to help kids be comfortable on stage and teach them elements of acting, staging, costumes, make up and more. I have worked with so many kids over the years, I have lost count of how many, but quite a few have stayed involved in productions at the center.

One young teen who started in the camp five years ago just sent me a message on Facebook, thanking me for helping him find his stage voice. I remember how hesitant he was to speak up when delivering lines, and now he is quite an accomplished actor, starring in his school's UIL one-act play last year.

This year I will be working with two young women, who both started with me as Young Players when they were in elementary school. One just finished her second year as a theatre major at Washington University in St. Louis, and the other just graduated from high school and will be going on to college to minor in theatrre. They will bring a new level of expertise to the camp, and I am so thrilled to be working with them.

The camp is very time intensive, both during the actual camp hours and preparing for the show in the evenings, so I will not have time for blogging. Thank goodness I can always borrow from my friends, Slim Randles and Tracy Farr, so I will be letting them entertain you most of the time for the next two weeks. Although I may blog from the camp if I have time, so stay tuned.

Friday's Odds and Ends

A five-year-old boy shot a four-year-old boy at a playground in Hillcrest Heights, Md., about 10 miles southeast of Washington, D.C.. Police wondert how a five-year-old had access to a gun.

Good question. Do you suppose it could be the fault of some irresponsible parent?

The judge in the Casey Anthony murder trial called a recess Friday just as prosecutors prepared to rebut testimony by Anthony's mother who claimed she -- not her daughter -- made suspicious Internet searches in the months before her 2-year-old granddaughter disappeared.


I understand a mother's urge to protect her daughter, but is this really believable? This whole story since the case first broke has read like a poorly plotted novel.


The NBA is in lockout, with the teams and the players unable to compromise on terms of new contracts. Owners want to reduce the players' guarantee of 57 percent of basketball revenue and weren't moved by the players' offer to drop it to 54.3 percent -- though players said that would have cut their salaries by $500 million over five years.


This seems to be a trend in professional sports, and I wonder when it became all about the money and not about the games. And, of course, as salaries and other expenses rise, so do ticket prices. So who pays in the end? The sports' fans.
 
Four months after Trent Schmidt was killed in a car accident, thieves broke into the Triumph Church in Greenwood, IN and stole musical instruments - including the bass guitar that Trent played. Trent was an associate pastor with his father, Stephen,  and his parents were devastated when the guitar was stolen. They made a public plea to the thieves to return the guitar, and apparently that worked. This past Wednesday morning Stephen and his wife were driving in the alley behind the church, and saw something that made them stop. The five-string bass guitar that Trent played at services at the church before joining the Army was left on the ground next to the air conditioner.

Another Excerpt from my Book

Back in June I started posting excerpts from my new book , which is a humorous memoir titled A Dead Tomato Plant and A Paycheck. This latest installment is from a chapter tentatively titled, Socially Unacceptable. As parents, we reach a point where we are barely tolerated by our children......

It's an indisputable fact that as parents our intelligence ratio is in direct proportion to the ages of our children. The younger they are, the smarter we are.

I came to this profound realization the day my oldest daughter turned 16 and half my gray matter disintegrated. I could hardly believe that she was the same daughter who used to consider me the final authority on everything from why God made bugs to how the moon got up in the sky.

How fondly I remembered those good old days when she was four and I was smart.

She stood in awe of me because I could answer all her questions, not to mention that I could actually grow a plant from her watermelon seed.

Then she grew up and it reached a point where I would have given almost anything for just one brief glimmer of that old wide-eyed wonder. In fact, I would have given anything for a simple nodding acknowledgment that I might know something besides my name, address, and phone number.

It was a terrible shock to realize this was happening to me. I had years of education behind me. Not to mention all the accumulated wisdom from the intervening years, and I was reduced to pre-kindergarten status by one disdainful glance.

I, who used to be the most respected beauty consultant outside of Glamour magazine, suddenly knew nothing about hair care or make up.

I, who used to rival Chef Tell and the Galloping Gourmet in the kitchen, was now hard pressed to turn out a decent carrot stick.

I, who at one point could have started my own designer label with all the cute little dresses I created, had about as much taste as Miss Piggy.

Mind you, this was the same daughter who used to wear those dresses and tell everyone that her mommy made them for her. Now she wanted all the old photographs destroyed so nobody would ever see that she once wore a dress made out of pillow ticking.

It was a cute dress. Honest. With little yellow daisies on it that I hand appliqued. But did that matter? No. All she worried about was the fashion police and the fact that someone might decide she looked like a pillow.

This disdain for my mental acuity reached a point that I started wishing we could go back in time so I could bask in her adoration once again.

But then I had a second thought on the subject.

If we went back in time, this day of reckoning would still be lurking in my future, and I'd eventually have to face into it. Since I was already there, I might as well tough it out while I still had a small shred of intelligence left.

And, there were four other kids waiting in line.