Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Why men like dogs and women like cats

As a change of pace from the last entry, here is another bit of humor from my friend, Tracy Farr....

Have you ever given much thought to why a majority of men prefer dogs and a majority of women prefer cats? I have. Not that I really care. But last Tuesday, having nothing better to do, I sat down and gave the question my undivided attention. Thirty minutes was just about all I could stand.

I believe men prefer dogs because dogs behave exactly the way a man wishes his woman would behave, but never will because women are smarter than that.

Dogs will fetch without complaining. They come when they’re called. T hey don’t mind rolling over to have their tummies scratched. And they’re always happy to wag a bit of tail. They don’t need extra time to “put on their face. ” They never grumble about how much football you watch. You can train them to do just about anything, and they never complain about how much more Debbie Howard’s husband makes compared to you.

Dogs have a one-track mind – they want to please. Women on the other hand are multi-faceted creatures that want to please up to a point – and if you don’t take out the trash, you’ll never get to that point.

Men would marry dogs if they could, but I think it’s illegal.

I have no idea why women prefer cats. I think it’s because cats purr. But other than that, cats and men have practically the same qualities – all of which are hated by women.

Cats stay out late at night and never tell you where they’ve been. They never come when called (unless it pertains to food), and they’re always spitting up globs of gunk that shouldn’t have been able to survive in their digestive system in the first place.

Cats leave hairs all over the place. They bring dead animals home and expect you to be impressed. They disappear whenever work needs to be done, and they expect you to clean up their poop because heaven knows they won’t do it themselves.

Women would never marry cats because that’s stupid. Besides, how would a cat support a family? On dead birds? I think not!

I told my man/woman, dog/cat theory to a good friend of mine. She said it was all bunk. She prefers dogs and her husband prefers cats.

As for me, I prefer goats. Goats aren’t like men or women. Goats are like goats. And as long as they eat my grass so I don’t have to mow, the more the merrier.

5 comments:

LuAnn said...

Cats may bring dead animals home, but isn't that familiar to men who brag about the fights they've won?

Anonymous said...

I prefer cats because of their independence. They don't smother you with affection, they give it when they feel like it. And since I like my independence too and my 'alone time', having a cat is idea. My cat doesn't tend to bring dead animals home, they are always still alive and flying or running around. I'd prefer dead thanks. At least the mess would be in one spot instead of all around the room.

I have a brother who has three cats and he and his wife love them like children. In fact they are their children, since they don't have the human kind.

Maryannwrites said...

Thanks for the comments, LuAnn and Dianne. I have cats and dogs, but have a slight preference for cats. I've blogged about them before and put up pictures of John, our HUGE cat who likes to be cradled like a baby. But only when he wants to be held of course. :-)

LuAnn said...

I don't have any pets, although my son has fish. Hmmm. If I had to choose, though, I would get a cat. I like their independence. Besides, if we were to take off for a weekend, a cat is perfectly happy to be home alone.

LuAnn said...

By the way, Maryann. Check out my blog and take a look at my new grandson! Now, there a sweet little pet!